More and more I'm noticing in the collective field this addiction to high-sensation experiences in spiritual growth.
Seeking out the major ayahuasca ceremony in Peru because that's going to blast us open and liberate us from all our problems.
Seeking out the intense sexual shamanic container that's going to blow us way outside our constrictive relational boundaries.
Investing in high ticket coaching containers that are way outside the range of what feels realistic financially because EXPANSION.
And here's the thing--all of these experiences and choices can 100% be aligned for you at one time or another in your life.
I've been the person that engaged in group intimacy containers that invited us to engage in practices and experiences with people *way* outside of my comfort zone or preference in the name of relational research.
I've engaged in deep dive ayahuasca journeys, mushroom journeys, cannabis, MDMA, LSD, etc because of the desire to bypass the control mechanisms of my mind and limiting mental attachments to my current identity.
I've been the person that invested $52,000 in a 9 month coaching container when I had no money in the bank and $40,000 in debt because of my desire to stretch my energetic system's capacity to wield greater wealth.
None of those decisions were "wrong".
Some of them were GREAT.
Some of them were deeply challenging.
Some of them were the most aligned choices in my life.
AND, some of them were decisions based in:
1) a desire to escape my current circumstances and be saved by an external experience, person, or group of people that I thought had more power than me
2) the idea that bigger and faster is better and if it isn't scary then I'm not growing or pushing my edges enough
3) old trauma-patterns where an old belief system was sending me the message that I need to abandon myself or go outside of my personal boundaries in order to get people to love (or choose) me
It's super nuanced.
What's an aligned expansive quantum leap experience for one person, can be a reperpetuation of trauma and self-violation for another.
I'm not going to get into any type of black-or-white generalized statements about what's right or wrong here...
...because all of these decisions about what is aligned in terms of the way we approach our personal growth and spiritual evolution is so unique to the individual and what is most aligned for their heart, soul, nervous system, and current physical reality.
What I *will* say in this moment is that I am truly enjoying the retirement of my "sensation-seeking intensity junkie" and leaning into the power of subtlety and attuned sustainable opening.
I've become so deeply attuned to my own energy, and the nature of how my system most thrives in terms of expansion and contraction when creating new realities and receiving the fulfillment of new desires.
I desire paced, sustainable opening.
I desire pleasurable, aligned expansion.
Where I'm deeply dedicated to holding and honoring my own nervous system and not bypassing her needs for sustainable integrative expansion in order to:
1) look cool/more evolved
2) fulfill someone else's desires/expectations/belief systems
3) avoid the fear of being left behind
My experience in my personal life and professional teaching work is that what MOST people who have been in the "spiritual awakening/ transformational container game" are most needing is permission to slow down and really learn how to honor and attune to their own nervous system.
To look at the places where we've been subtly (or not so subtly) bypassing the true pacing our soul is longing for because we've learned to reject or neglect our own needs in exchange for the validation of others.
It's such intimate, tender, and vulnerable work, because it requires us to both MEET and HOLD ourselves in the places where we've been ignoring or rejecting our core truths, needs, and boundaries for a very long time...
...which yes, is uncomfortable at times, but also the *essential* ingredient in restoring integrity with ourselves and our bodies so that we can truly open to receiving so much more of what we TRULY desire in our lives without feeling like we need to abandon ourselves in the process.
Devotion to and integrity with Self is the core foundation of all the teaching/coaching spaces I hold for people—and it begins with myself and how I show up in my life and intimate relationships.
I've gotta be right with me.
And from that place see that beauty that manifests all around me.
This is devotion.
This is alignment.
This is embodiment.
This is integration.
And this is what, in my opinion, is essential for finding grounding and stability in our own spiritual (and relational) awakening.
With Love,
Arielle Brown
#rememberwhoyouare
Pacing Our Growth in Spiritual Expansion