How Our Feelings Weigh Down Our Bodies


It isn’t easy being a human being these days.

We are told how to look, how to be, how to act and how to feel as a prescription to being loved and accepted by others, and, quite frankly, it blows.

We live in a culture obsessed with emotional, mental, physical and spiritual perfection, and in the pursuit of that picture-perfect, even-keeled, inside the box ideal, we start to suppress and shut down who we truly are, because if we’re not tapped into the paradigm social acceptability, then we believe we are sh*t out of luck for a date to the dance—so to speak.

What does it feel like to smother your anger under layers of false smiles and stifled words? What does it feel like to perpetually swallow a powerful truth that is begging to be spoken? How does it feel in your body what you let others take advantage of you or not honor your personal boundaries?

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Truth, Love & Presidential Elections

I feel gravity this morning. I feel a weight and solidity in my body that is surprising, yet soothing. I know Trump is our new president. I know that many of his views run counter-intuitive to everything that I stand for, as a human, and especially as a women. 

I feel aware that simply for the fact that I am a white upper middle class woman that I have liberties that many people of other colors, genders and background do not have, haven't had, and will never have. And knowing all of that, I will still say this:

I don't feel afraid. And I don't feel anger either. It could be easy to feel anger at the sheer number of people who did vote for Trump, and use the fact that I voted for Hillary as an excuse for why I'm exempt from the creation of this startling reality.

But the truth is, Trump being in office is as much a reflection of myself as a reflection of the most angry, racist, misogynistic psychopath we've seen on camera at a Trump rally. Hell, at least that guy is letting his vitriolic freak flag fly.

Having reflects wanting. And the fact that we HAVE a man as president who has expressed such seething hatred, judgment, and disdain for so many people on this planet, it means that on some level, we believe this, we need this, we WANT this.

Trump being elected has me asking myself the following questions:

Where am I still suppressing my voice because of my fears about my inadequacy or fallibility as a woman?

Where do I still hold deep-seeded judgments of others based upon their belief systems, their anatomy, or the color of their skin?

Where am I still operating under the false belief that anyone has the key to my power and freedom other than myself?

I do not claim to be a woman who is versed in the details of politics, government and law. But I am a woman who is deeply versed in the wisdom, workings and evolution of the Soul.

And what I do know is EVERYTHING that occurs outside of me (especially that which instills within me seething angering or paralyzing fear) is a reflection of something within me desiring to be acknowledged, claimed, and brought into the light.

So today I feel grounded, and more clear than ever of the path that I am walking--as a human, and especially as a woman. 

With a man in office already speaking of his intention to take away a woman's right to choice of her own body--now is the time more than ever for women to bring our voices into the world.

Now is the time for women to recognize the medicine that only WE can bring to the planet. And that we can only bestow our medicine when we release all shame for who we are, what we desire, and what we believe in the deepest conviction of our own hearts. 

I am a stand for women claiming the power of their voice when they bask in the radiance of an open and unapologetic heart. And I am in support of building community around women stepping into the unique expression of their magic, of their power, that this world is so desperately asking for.

If you are a woman who feels these words resonating as truth in your bones, I invite you to join the community and conversation of women on the same Path in my closed FB group, Sex, Power & Magic, by clicking here:

And if you are a human, resonating with the words I am writing, I invite you to be compassionate with yourself today for the places where you still imprison yourself with your judgments, your insecurities, and your blindspots. 

You are reading this because you ARE doing the work, and yes, there is always more to be done. But trust yourself, and trust in the power of what is possible when we look at ourselves and the world with compassionately honest eyes. For the truth is not the whole truth, unless it is spoken with love.

The Willingness to Have What We Want

We can have anything we want.

That's not the issue.

The issue is that we're unwilling let go of all the stories and deeply ingrained beliefs systems that have us convinced of why we can't have it.

"I don't deserve it".

"It costs too much".

"It's not the right time".

"It's inconvenient for my relationship".

And here is my response to all of these reasons (which I myself have been a speaker of):

* The very fact you exist implies you deserve it.
* If you truly want something, you'll always find a way to make it happen.
* It's never the 'perfect' time to irrevocably transform the course of your life.
* If you're shutting down your desires in your relationships, that is something to look at".

So let's go beneath the surface stories and into the real raw truth.

Why do we avoid pursuing and actualizing our deepest desires and living our purpose?

Because we are afraid of the magnitude of our own power.

We are afraid of letting go of the small identity we have clung to for so long because it has kept us safe within a world that shames the rebellious act of being Yourself.

We are afraid of losing the relationships on our life that have kept us comfortable in our chosen subjugation.

We are afraid of making others uncomfortable in the magnitude of our presence and unapologetic nature.

We are afraid of the responsibility that we would have to take for EVERY single thing that we attract into our life.

Yes. That all makes sense. I get why you're afraid. It's terrifying to take responsibility for the magnitude of our power and impact on the world around us.

It's terrifying to acknowledge that there are no limitations to what we can have, except for the stories we cling to that strangle our spirit and block out our light.

So why would we choose this path, of having what you TRULY want? Because to have what we TRULY, it requires us to embody your True Nature. It requires us to become an intimate lover of our own Soul, and dive into the deepest parts of who we are that we hide from most of the world.

This is where our power resides, and when we do the work of reclaiming and embodying our True Nature, we become a magnet for the people, places and experiences that will reveal to us our Soul Purpose--it will reveal to us who we are when we live in the full out expression of our Greatness.

What I am speaking of is a life without limitations. A life steeped in the full expression of our purpose here on this planet. And a life filled with pleasure, peace and fulfillment beyond what we can currently imagine.

We can have it. It is our birthright. And it begins with a step outside of your comfort zone, and into the unknown.

Everything You Want Is In Your Body

Our ability to attract and receive that which we truly want in our life comes down to our ability and willingness to be embodied--meaning, the degree to which we choose to inhabit our body. 

Most of us spend our lives checked out of our body, living up in our heads, in our stories, around why it's not safe or not okay to be in our body now. The majority of reasons we do this ultimately come down to two things: Shame and Fear--the dynamic duo of disempowerment.

My experience is that often (but not always), shame precipates fear. They cycle seems to be that we experience shame about some aspect of our existence, often associated with the following:

- shame about the shape/size/weight of our body
- shame about our sexuality
- shame the things we desire or the things that give us pleasure
- shame about what we have NOT accomplished
- shame about money, career, family, relationship, health, etc.

And because of this experience of shame in one of (or several) of the areas spoken above, we experience fear around having to feel the emotional and physical pain that said shame provokes.
So, we choose to disembody, living up in our heads, and sometimes fully out of our bodies (thank you New Age movement), in order to avoid the pain, prescribing to the story "I'll decide to fully inhabit my body....

....once I lose the weight.
....once I have the right relationship.
....once I have financial stability.
....once I land my dream job.
....once I'm PERFECT.

What a PERFECT recipe for never fully inhabiting your body--choosing to put the full embodiment of human life on hold until all circumstances and conditions are perfect.

It's never going to happen.

Our lives are constantly showing us the places we have more healing to do, more walls to take down, more bridges to build where the destinations will hold more fruit than that which currently exist--but to hold off on BEING here right now, in anticipation of the "big exhale" of perfection, disconnects of from the very power source that can fuel the creation of a life rich with our deepest fulfillments.

To attract and receive the people and experiences that will truly nourish and fulfill us, we need to be IN our body. Otherwise, one of two things (or both) tend to happen.

1) We believe we are unworthy of what we want, and consciously push it way, or subconscious sabotage it's presence in our life.
2) We pursue relationships, careers or material things that aren't ACTUALLY what we want, but pursue them anyway because we've been told by others (family, society, peers) they will make us happy.

Do you know what you want? Do you ACTUALLY know what you want? Are you waiting for that "last thing" to click into place before you feel safe/worthy of fully inhabiting your body? Are you living a life of your choosing? Are you willing to be here now?

I ask you these questions, because I ask myself these questions every day. I've learned that creating a life of my choosing requires me to become curious of all the places I am saying "No" to being here right now. All the magic arises from a feeling, and all feeling begins in the body.

I love you.


I Love Getting Triggered

One of my greatest teachers is a woman who triggers the shit out of me, and I'm not even paying her to do it. And before I go into detail, let me offer my own personal definition of "getting triggered".

"Getting triggered" means that some external stimuli, whether an individual or a situation, evokes an emotionally charged response in us the feels intense, irrational, and is usually quite uncomfortable to experience. Emotions often associated with getting triggered include anger, fierce judgment, jealousy, despair, confusion, torment--and the list goes on. The next thing that can often occur is a desire to lash out at or make wrong the person/situation that catalyzed the intense feelings. This can also be followed by feelings of victimization, helplessness and disempowerment. Sound familiar?

So here's the thing-- When we get triggered, there is an opportunity for us to discover an old (and sometimes ancient) pattern that is trapping us in a way of being that doesn't serve or empower us. And it is in this moment, where we can either choose to play out an old story, or become curious of what the message is beneath the emotional reaction. What are you protecting? What part of you is lashing out so fiercely to cover up the deeper desire for love, acceptance and permission for exactly who you are in this moment? Where is this an opportunity for me to reclaim more of who I am?

These are the questions I ask myself when I feel triggered. And this woman, this amazingly powerful woman who evokes such frustration, indignance, anger and desire all at once, offers me the opportunity to be humble, curious and supremely powerful, by inviting me to take full responsibility for my experience. Becoming curious of what part of me is wanting to be reclaimed and re-integrated, rather than going into the fear that I can't have access to this piece of my power.

What if we stopped blaming anyone for anything? What if we took 100% responsibility for everything that happened to us, no matter how out of our control the circumstance seemed? How would we live life differently if we know that our every thought, every emotion, every belief shaped our external reality? These are the questions I ask myself and live by every day. And let me tell you, it is a rich, rewarding and infinitely enchanted life I do lead.

With Love,



I Am Here to Help Women Remember

I am here to help women remember who we are. I am here to help all beings remember that our natural state is joy and wonder, and it is from this place that ALL divine creation occurs. I am here to help women access and remember their sacred essence, through reconnecting to their pleasure and sexuality. And through MY sexuality, I am here to give men permission to let the beast within them roar with pride, power, and permission.

I am passionate about women giving themselves permission to fully own, express, and live from the deepest desires. I am passionate about helping women seeing their emotionality, their intuition, their fluctuation in mood and mind, their sensitivity, their magic--everything that we have been shame and slaughtered for in the past--as what makes us powerful and wise.

I am fed up with living in a culture full of men who are afraid to be Masculine, and women who are afraid to be Feminine. I am fed up with living in a culture where women fear they are too much for men, and men fear they are not enough for women. I am fed up with living in a culture where people would rather suffer and slowly die inside in silence, then speak the truth of their heart. I am sick and tired of living in a culture of man-hating women, and women-hating men. It is time to come together, as men and women, and say the things that keep us separated--that keep us fragmented, and cause the very destruction that we seeing happening to this beautiful planet that we live on. A balancing of the Masculine and Feminine needs to occur. Both sexes have the struggle of our conditioning to work with. We have both been shamed for being the very thing that makes us who we are, and we must ALL take responsibility for letting go of the conditioning and shame that keeps us enslaved, bitter, resentful and afraid.

I myself, keep myself enslaved by thinking "who am I to hold such bold a claim and belief as the one listed above". I am a young, blonde, white woman living in America, who has always had food on her table and a roof over her head. I think "how dare you be angry, entitled to more, or in judgment of the people around you?" "You more than 90% of the world population". Yet here I am, feeling these very feelings, and the reason I feel entitled to do so is because I am an embodiment of everything I know must change on this planet. Every day, my commitment is to free myself of all the ropes, shackles and beliefs, that have kept me stuck in the very culture I speak of above. I have feared being judged, ridiculed, cut down, laughed at, attacked, you name it, for the conviction of feeling and thought I hold within me if I was to express it outwards. And I have done those very things to myself in order to remain silent.

So, my commitment, moving forward, is to share what I believe, in utter power and humility, knowing that I will both inspire and trigger those who I touch with my words, and everything in between. Perhaps my biggest fear is that I will do neither--and that my words will fall on an indifferent audience with no ears or desire to hear me. And that is my challenge, am I willing to speak up, regardless of the reception or welcome? My answer is YES, I am and I will, from this moment out. I will speak and I will rise. Thank you.